These days we have chosen the new one by Joshua Idehen as Album of the Week, based on his great concerts offered in Spain, by Primavera Tours. The way to enter “I know you’re hurting…” is through bangers for the dance floor like ‘This Is The Place’, ‘Turn It Around’ or ‘It Always Was’, which was already Song of the Day.
But the signature, unforgettable, unmistakable song on the album is ‘Mum Does the Washing’. It is incredible that a song like this has almost 2 million listens, but as a parody of different economic systems, artistic currents or social movements, depending on “who does the laundry” it has caught on with the public. What is it that samples? Perhaps a version of ‘If I Were a Richman’ with the pitch changed? First and foremost, Joshua Idehen is a poet, so let his words do the talking:
«The world according to how your mother washes clothes
Capitalism:
Your mother does the laundry, you pay her a dollar
You ask him to wash your friend’s clothes, your friend pays you fifty dollars
Communism:
Your mother washes the clothes, you wash the clothes
Every night, you greet a photo of your father
Socialism:
Your mother does the laundry, you cook
Everyone is happy, in theory
Feudalism:
Your mother washes your clothes and pays you taxes
Colonialism:
You enter your mother’s room without permission
You say that you were the one who discovered your mother’s room
And you leave all your dirty clothes on the floor
Fascism:
Your mother does the laundry
And you’re obsessed with his nose
Liberalism:
You watch your mother wash the clothes
And you feel really, really bad
“Something has to be done,” you say.
And it may or may not be done
Libertarianism:
Your mother does the laundry
And you think you washed it
Religion:
Your mother does the laundry
And you thank God
Atheism:
Your mother does the laundry
You make a 12-part video on YouTube demanding revised evidence.
That, indeed, he did wash the clothes
Zionism:
You pushed your mother into the washing machine
And the spin made her dizzy
And that dizziness made her vomit
And you point to that vomit and call it anti-Semitism
Americanism:
Your mother does the laundry
It’s in the Constitution
End of discussion
Mansplaining:
Your mother does the laundry
You tell him how to do it better
when you’ve never washed clothes
Same-sex marriage:
Your mothers wash clothes
Patriarchy:
Your mother does not exist
Clothes mysteriously wash themselves
TERFas:
Your mother doesn’t want your other mother to do the laundry.
For things like genitals and so on.
Survey:
There is a 70% chance
That you do the laundry on Saturday night
100% that your mother has washed it
Sunday morning
Africanism:
You go to Benny’s house
Benny’s mother does the laundry
You ask your mother why she doesn’t wash it
You don’t survive that night
Feminism:
Your mother insists that you grow up and wash your own clothes.
White feminism:
Your mother hired a black woman to do her laundry.
Male feminism:
The only time I did laundry
I told everyone I did the laundry
I wrote a post on my blog
I bragged about it
I took a selfie
Instagram Story
I was on TV
I won an Oscar
I played Fortnite
Dance
I am an ally
Hashtag #MeToo
Egalitarianism:
The only time you did laundry
It is proof that we are all equal and that no one needs feminism anymore
Hip-hop:
Every day I try
Every day I try
When I bring the basket
Mom puts the clothes
Narcissism:
You look good in the clothes your mother washed
Surrealism:
The clothes your mother washed
